


Fallen Angel, Baby, Wasted Mortal Time

by radiochattertherapy (murderousCohort)



Category: Original Work
Genre: Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-19
Updated: 2015-10-19
Packaged: 2018-04-27 01:59:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5029318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/murderousCohort/pseuds/radiochattertherapy





	Fallen Angel, Baby, Wasted Mortal Time

My name is Gabriel and I'm worthless and I think that maybe sometimes I am a fool and that I messed up. 

Honestly I get distracted way too easily but when I say "mother I'm headed south" She tsks and whispers sweetly "Gabriel your mind is poisoned" but uses dead words to name me and seems to hate my life and to hate how I look and how I live. 

I want to die and I've cut myself in many. many places and I breathe despair and my name is Indigo which is ink and I am ink too, staining everyone around me with despair because who I am is the devil although I live like an angel, darling, I wish to fly and I breathe myself in and I breathe my worth out and it falls and I am worth so so little to anyone, honestly 

she says she loves me but I remember that boy and I remember the girl and I miss my old girl who told me. told me we would be friends forever and she would never leave me well how did that work out for you, baby, I think you're sad inside 

once I told her I did not love her love for love and she cringed and backtracked in such a sad sad painful manner like a kicked dog that only knows hurt and knows pain and I know you, avienda, I know your heart and your wiles and you don't know my pain and OH, I loved you once but now I feel unloved and it is SO so lonely being alone and being one person and being 

how do I say this

the worst thing to live

I breathe ink and I breathe despair and my heart pulsates regularly with the cringing aching pain that is loneliness and sometimes I feel real pain where I once had a soul in there

I give my things away and pass out my soul and give up who I am for whoever is pretty enough in their wiles and I do not understand humanity because I am not human, no. 

I am an angel and I wish for life and for love and for innocence and for forgiveness like we all do and I wish that no matter what I could not be hated

I can't even decide who I am, honey, I'm a goner and my life is a cautionary tale that only exists to warn others "Don't act as he did, because he fell like a shooting star and now he's DEAD AS A GODDAMNED DOORNAIL, BABY. 

well, he didn't live for nothing, because he burned fast and bright like a shooting star and he never. never nevernevrnevernvebmevmer meant anything to anybody and he deserved that death, baby, you bet he did. 

you don't get to where he was without burning out because when you throw your soul into the fire it burns, hon, souls are so fucking flammable and they fade SO fucking fast. 

he didn't even want to live, he clung to death. he clung to the sweet unknown and here he is with budding breasts and a blooming pain the size of London


End file.
